GET OFF YOUR F&*(*&*($%$% PHONE

Nothing sends me into a tizzy more then someone who talks on their cell phone in an elevator. While I spend 90 seconds descending floors, I have to hear about your naked evening/one night stand/stomach problems/awful boss...all I want is to enjoy the silence as I try to ignore the stench of your HORRIFIC  perfume. I was a breath away from screaming, "GET OFF YOUR F@#%&*%( PHONE" when the doors opened and out she pranced, horrific fur coat and all.

What has happened to this world? Where's the respect and proper etiquette that used to exist? Are the British Monarchy the only ones that still sip tea with their pinky a fly? Gone are the days of silence is golden, elbows off the table (how can one text without them), long meals and actual conversations. Cell phones have changed our lives whether we like it or not. Just a few weeks ago, a woman was killed by an elevator. She didn't see the "out of service" sign because she was texting as she stepped into it. Up it shot...folding her like a cheap suit, causing her premature demise.

And of course there are those candidates whose cell phones go off during interviews. I'm sorry...but for 60 minutes, there is NO one that NEEDS to get a hold of you. Even if it's your child's school calling to say little Tommy threw up on his teacher and needs to be picked up, they are not going to throw him onto the street...they will keep him safe and sound in the infirmary until you can get him. We are ALL addicted to our phones and unfortunately it doesn't look like there's any rehab in sight.

Apps; text messages; BBM; FACE time...it's virtually (no pun intended) impossible to disconnect yourself from the world. What fun is that...I mean do we really NEED a waterproof cell phone cover so you can take it scuba diving...just in case Warren Buffet calls while you're 20 feet under asking if you want to take over Berkshire Hathaway? I mean c'mon people...let go. Go out. Smell the roses. Enjoy the coffee. Remember what is was like when all that existed were landlines, Atari, AM/FM radio and network television. Life was simple. The Cosby Show made us laugh and my friends made emergency break-throughs because there was no such thing as call waiting.

And to all my job hunters out there...your cell phone is your BEST friend...stay connected; be available to your recruiter or friends helping you with you search. Return messages; respond to texts; don't go MIA. BUT...after you put on your suit, print out your resume and SPIT OUT YOUR GUM...turn off said phone...because no one likes to be interrupted or think that someone or someTHING is more important then they are...especially the person looking to determine your dedication and commitment to their company.

Good night and happy job hunting,
The Job Yenta