Wednesday, January 26, 2011


As far as I'm concerned, the term "working mom" is redundant. Whether you're in an office or at home, if you're lucky enough to be called "mommy" by anyone other then the dirty construction worker on the corner of 48th and 3rd, you work for a living...and one of those jobs is the hardest one of the planet.

Recently, I read something in Parenting magazine that caught my eye. The reader wrote in that she was the "only parent at work and colleagues complained behind her back about her responsibilities at home." The advice given was not to confront the naysayers, but rather find the office gossip and tell him/her how much overtime you're putting in. Tell him/her that they're fortunate because once they leave the office at 5, they can relax and take off their work hat. You, on the other hand, start your OTHER job the minute you walk into the house. You put in all these hours on nights and weekends to make up for what you're missing when you're at the office. But ultimately what matters is that we get our jobs done. Personally, I'd just tell my co-workers to go @&#%$! themselves and add laxatives to their coffee, but I guess for the sake of office politics, this advice is not bad either. Ultimately, you spend more time in an office than anywhere else, so it should be worth your while.

I always find it interesting when moms are ostracized, whispered about or suffer because they've chosen to stay active in the workforce. As a "two-job mom" myself, I remember having to deal with these cynics when I returned to my current workplace after owning my own recruiting firm for six years. While I have the "luxury" of only going into the city twice a week, as all of my candidates, clients, friends and family members will attest to, I'm ALWAYS working. But that didn't matter to my co-workers...even my girlfriend who's also a "two-job mom" gave me shit about not being in the office every day. "Did you meet my candidate, Sally Unemployed? Oh that's right, you're only here two days..." was her favorite line. It wasn't until I outperformed all of them (except one), that they finally shut their mouths.  Funny how the mommy works two days/week and manages to outperform all her co-workers...while raising two daughters (ages 4 1/2 and 16 months)...just another testament to how strong "two-job moms" really are!

Since I moved to the suburbs, a majority of my stay-at-home mom friends have asked me to help them find jobs.They feel like their brains are turning to mush and they need some interaction with the real world. I guess lunches, manicures and playing tennis can get boring after awhile.  And nothing frustrates me more than sitting at dinner with friends and having to hear about the latest sale at lululemon or that Bobby peed on the floor in the middle of the night and then fell asleep in it. I only have ONE friend who literally wanted her career to be a mom. She went to college PURELY to find a husband and future father to her children. And kudos to her for admitting it! But everyone else gave up their careers when they had their first child. And now that their youngest is in school full time, they are ready to head back to a job. Of course there's the stipulation of work/life balance, so if that's achievable, they'll be on the 7:15 express to employment.

The moral of this soliloquy is that moms are amazing human beings. Whether you choose to stay home or head to an office every day, there is no one on the planet who works harder than you (shout out to stay at home dads as well). So keep your chin up, buy your coffee in bulk and if all else fails, aquaphor makes a great lip gloss.

Good night and happy job hunting,
The Job Yenta

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